Hold Me Like A Grudge

[Camila Adaronde]

Camila hadn't found herself to be the best when it came to reading people, but she knew her own emotions. At least, a little bit. She'd been able to relate - even if only partially - to what the woman had been going through. Nodding her head along with Shizuka's words, she simply took the opportunity to listen. She did what she could to act as level-headed as possible, given the situation at hand.

As she finished, Camila found herself chuckling softly. "You don't need to be better," she started, "I'll be the first to tell you that this world is full of strife. Strife of every variety imaginable, and strife that's going to plague you even into the next life. It takes a lot out of someone. Especially someone that's been through as much as you have. Given that, the worst thing you can force on yourself is to just move on without taking the time you need, ya hear?"

She looked down. Truthfully, she should've really taken the time to follow her own advice. Her actions in the past were nothing short of brash, intense, and self-motivated, whether she wanted to admit to it or not. She'd delved deep into the depths of her own anger in the span of a few short months, only to further weaponize it against the world around her. A world that might not have deserved that kind of treatment, as she'd realize if she'd taken the time to properly reflect.

But, that wasn't something that was in the cards for the Vizard at the time. Even now, she'd still found herself questioning whether inward reflection was for her or not. Regardless of that answer however, she did recognize - especially after multiple people having pointed it out to her - that her mental health was starting to suffer because of it. In time, she'd turn her head back to the Fullbringer beside her, a serene smile plastered across her face.

"Just... Don't neglect yourself, okay? Redirecting energy away from problems is all right, but don't let it get to the point where you don't reflect on the past at all. Our vices, experiences, and problems make up who we are today; usually for the better, I'd like to think."

"And, honestly? People as like us - people as strong as us - don't really have the luxury of having folks that stick around. Especially when every world is at war with one another; Shinigami sparking conflict with the Hollows, the Vandenreich looking to pick up the pieces, and even y'all here having to deal with the aftermaths of the Human World serving as a battleground... It's a messy situation all-round. That's before even beginning to touch on relationships!" The girl began to laugh, though it felt almost forced. Her eyes started to water.

[Shizuka Sanamizu ✮]

Cami's words resonated more than she'd probably ever realize. It felt as if Shizuka had been waiting her entire life just for someone to tell her it's okay. She harbored a lot of hatred and anger that she typically played off since she never wanted to let anyone know how much she was hurting. She didn't bottle it up or anything, but she also didn't have a healthy method of expelling the negativity that had built up over so many years. It was difficult enough just to keep herself together on a normal day. She supposed that was because she was constantly trying to act like everything was normal. It wasn't.

Shizuka wanted a normal life. She enjoyed the one she had, but she wanted something calm for herself. Or, rather, she wished for it. Cami was right in everything she said, and it was more apparent than ever that people were trying to pick fights with everybody for random reasons. It could be exhausting at times. One of the things Shizuka wanted for her organization was to rid the world of people who sought to destroy everything, along with maybe eradicating the Shinigami on top of it. But that vendetta was so much more personal. There were things she had to do first before that could finally come to fruition.

Still, it seemed like some of what this woman was saying didn't just resonate with the Fullbringer. Cami had gotten emotional, too. This conversation was becoming much deeper than expected, and Shizuka was realizing that she kind of enjoyed that. Being able to be real with someone who could be real with her was refreshing, to say the least, and it made the weight on her shoulders feel that much lighter. So to try to distract Cami enough to help keep her from crying, Shizuka got up off the bench and stretched her arms upward, enjoying the feeling of fresh mobility. Since Cami couldn't be seen by other people, she wondered for a moment what they might be able to do without making things weird.

"Y'know what? You're right. And our feelings are completely valid. Our lives are ours to live and that's just how it is, but it feels nice to be able to dish it all out like this! Like I can breathe now. And it just took a complete stranger listening to me for a minute." She thought for a moment before looking at Cami again. "Is it okay if we're not strangers anymore?"

How disappointed would her aunt be if she found out that Shizuka was trying to make friends with a Shinigami again? Well, sort of. Vizards were different, right? So it didn't count. Besides, it wasn't every day that someone was able to talk Shizuka off the ledge, and she hoped she was able to do the same. She felt this odd need to support Cami after the short time they've spent together, but maybe it was because they hit it off so well to start. That was nice. So no more crying, no more being depressed, no more negativity. Hopefully. Cami proved that Shizuka wasn't the only person going through hard things in life. She wasn't alone.

"Oh, and is there anywhere we can go where you being a ghost won't be a problem?"

[✠Asmoskon Masurao✠]

Shizuka: 50 % Bonus

Cami: 45 % Bonus