Post by Addy Kuchiki on Sept 3, 2023 8:49:26 GMT -5
Staring down at the Asauchi laying across her lap, Addy let out a small sigh. What was she not understanding? What did she need in order to understand her sword? Her zanpakuto? Her weapon was a part of her. A part of her that she didn’t understand. And that was unacceptable. Deep in her soul was someone she needed to meet. Yet it seemed no matter how hard she tried to do so, they were just out of reach.
Caressing the hilt of her sword softly, the young woman began to softly hum. Was it her emotional state holding her back? Sure the past few weeks had been hectic, but that was life. Was she truly meant to find her calm amidst the storm? Is this what everyone had to go through for their zanpakuto to emerge? Shaking her head, Addy attempted to clear some of her noisy thoughts away. What other people did didn’t matter. They weren’t her. She would find her own path.
Closing her eyes gently, Addy attempted to calm her racing heart. She was a high energy woman, always on the lookout for something exciting to do. Yet, she felt that her go to strategy wouldn’t particularly work in this situation. After all, she had been this way almost all her life…yet the blade in her hand still remained silent. It was time to clear her worries. Clear her mind. And attempt to understand the unknown.
Feel. What did she feel? What was she feeling? The wind on her skin. Her hair rustling in the cool breeze of the morning. The smoothness of the sheath of her Asauchi. All outward things. Surely this wasn’t what she was meant to feel. She felt this on the daily. But if so, then what? What should be the next step? Relaxing her muscles as best as she could, Addy pondered as the tenseness left her body. What was she meant to understand?
Focusing her thoughts inward, Addy began to ignore the outside world. In her brief time as a full fledged shinigami, the young Kuchiki had learned many things. Things she once thought were impossible. Things that defied the laws of nature. And how were these things possible? She vaguely remembered learning briefly about this stuff in the academy, but the specifics eluded her. It had something to do with the energy around her and the energy hidden within.
She understood terms like Reiryoku and Reishi, but those words weren’t what she really wanted to focus on. No, she needed something simpler. Something that applied to her in the here and now. Something she could use. It only took a few minutes of thought before the right word came to her. The Soul. With a strong soul, anything was possible. And if this was the case, then that meant her zanpakuto emerging had to do with her soul. Now she just had to figure out what to do with this realization.
How does one even go about feeling for their soul? How do you attempt to feel something that has no parallel? No comparison? As minutes passed by with no results, Addy decided it was time to change things up a bit. Perhaps she was thinking too grand. She was a simple woman after all. Whenever she had a problem to solve, she broke it down into steps and knocked it out one piece at a time. This method was easier than attempting to solve the whole problem at once. Trying it out here couldn’t hurt, so she might as well give it a shot.
Thankfully the past hour or so she had spent contemplating hadn’t been completely useless. She didn’t need to start at step one, more like step three or four if she had to guess. The first step was figuring out how to understand her Asauchi, in order to gain her zanpakuto. This step was solved by figuring out that she needed to understand herself, or her soul more specifically. The second step was figuring out how to even feel her soul. After all, that was a crucial part in succeeding.
She wasn’t sure which teacher it was, but Addy remembered hearing about finding her inner peace. She didn’t really understand it at the time, but perhaps now she could apply the information that she previously had no use for. If all she could feel was herself, surely her soul would be included in that. At least that was what she believed. Currently she was as relaxed as she could be. Midway between meditation and zoning out. If she couldn’t find her inner peace in this state, she wasn’t sure when she would be able to.
In and out. In and out. Cycling between her nose and mouth, Addy began to take slow but deep breaths. She was the wind, or something close to it. The specifics didn’t matter. All that mattered was the feeling. The feeling of letting go. Understanding. Letting all of her negative emotions go, until only the positive ones remained. Remembering why she was doing this. Why she wanted to be stronger. To protect those she cared for. To be able to look at herself in the mirror and be proud of who she was. And right now, she was happy to be Addy. Happy to be living the life that she had.
[Training for CTP]
Caressing the hilt of her sword softly, the young woman began to softly hum. Was it her emotional state holding her back? Sure the past few weeks had been hectic, but that was life. Was she truly meant to find her calm amidst the storm? Is this what everyone had to go through for their zanpakuto to emerge? Shaking her head, Addy attempted to clear some of her noisy thoughts away. What other people did didn’t matter. They weren’t her. She would find her own path.
Closing her eyes gently, Addy attempted to calm her racing heart. She was a high energy woman, always on the lookout for something exciting to do. Yet, she felt that her go to strategy wouldn’t particularly work in this situation. After all, she had been this way almost all her life…yet the blade in her hand still remained silent. It was time to clear her worries. Clear her mind. And attempt to understand the unknown.
Feel. What did she feel? What was she feeling? The wind on her skin. Her hair rustling in the cool breeze of the morning. The smoothness of the sheath of her Asauchi. All outward things. Surely this wasn’t what she was meant to feel. She felt this on the daily. But if so, then what? What should be the next step? Relaxing her muscles as best as she could, Addy pondered as the tenseness left her body. What was she meant to understand?
Focusing her thoughts inward, Addy began to ignore the outside world. In her brief time as a full fledged shinigami, the young Kuchiki had learned many things. Things she once thought were impossible. Things that defied the laws of nature. And how were these things possible? She vaguely remembered learning briefly about this stuff in the academy, but the specifics eluded her. It had something to do with the energy around her and the energy hidden within.
She understood terms like Reiryoku and Reishi, but those words weren’t what she really wanted to focus on. No, she needed something simpler. Something that applied to her in the here and now. Something she could use. It only took a few minutes of thought before the right word came to her. The Soul. With a strong soul, anything was possible. And if this was the case, then that meant her zanpakuto emerging had to do with her soul. Now she just had to figure out what to do with this realization.
How does one even go about feeling for their soul? How do you attempt to feel something that has no parallel? No comparison? As minutes passed by with no results, Addy decided it was time to change things up a bit. Perhaps she was thinking too grand. She was a simple woman after all. Whenever she had a problem to solve, she broke it down into steps and knocked it out one piece at a time. This method was easier than attempting to solve the whole problem at once. Trying it out here couldn’t hurt, so she might as well give it a shot.
Thankfully the past hour or so she had spent contemplating hadn’t been completely useless. She didn’t need to start at step one, more like step three or four if she had to guess. The first step was figuring out how to understand her Asauchi, in order to gain her zanpakuto. This step was solved by figuring out that she needed to understand herself, or her soul more specifically. The second step was figuring out how to even feel her soul. After all, that was a crucial part in succeeding.
She wasn’t sure which teacher it was, but Addy remembered hearing about finding her inner peace. She didn’t really understand it at the time, but perhaps now she could apply the information that she previously had no use for. If all she could feel was herself, surely her soul would be included in that. At least that was what she believed. Currently she was as relaxed as she could be. Midway between meditation and zoning out. If she couldn’t find her inner peace in this state, she wasn’t sure when she would be able to.
In and out. In and out. Cycling between her nose and mouth, Addy began to take slow but deep breaths. She was the wind, or something close to it. The specifics didn’t matter. All that mattered was the feeling. The feeling of letting go. Understanding. Letting all of her negative emotions go, until only the positive ones remained. Remembering why she was doing this. Why she wanted to be stronger. To protect those she cared for. To be able to look at herself in the mirror and be proud of who she was. And right now, she was happy to be Addy. Happy to be living the life that she had.
[Training for CTP]