Post by Amara Tamagawa on Apr 10, 2020 18:26:16 GMT -5
Tamagawa, Amara
--"All the things we've forgotten scream for help in dreams"
**Character Theme**
ESSENTIALS:
Discord Name: PineappleOnPizza#1261
Password 1: Black Hole
Password 2: Moon Pray
Character Type: "Permanent Release"
Squad: 10th Division, Primary Defense Squad
Rank: Captain
DEMOGRAPHICS:
Name: Tamagawa, Amara
Nicknames: 'Red Foot'
Age of Death: Amara was born as a Pure Soul
Real Age / Apparent Age: 380, appearing ~28
Birthday (Monday/Day): August 4th
Birthplace: Rukongai District 8
Blood Type: O+
Roleplay Sample Included here.
APPEARANCE:
Height: 6'0 or 182cm
Weight: 125lbs or 58kg
Eye Color: Indigo/Blue
Hair Color: Blonde, almost Platinum
Amara is a fit and athletic woman appearing to be in her mid-late twenties. Her medium length blonde hair is most often left down and left to lazy beach curls, although you're just as likely to find it pulled back into a ponytail when she gets to work. In the midday sun it gleans silvery almost platinum. Her lips, full and slightly pouty, are most often adorned with either feminine and light colors like cotton-candy pink, or darker and more sultry colors like cherry red. Her eyes, naturally marbled and vibrant indigo, are set behind smokey eyeliner and eye-shadow blue and purple in tone. Her irises deepen and intensify in color as she uses her powers or channels her energy through her well-muscled form.
Amara's complexion is nearly flawless and is complemented by only the most basic application of foundation, toner, and blush to round out the look. Even without the makeup, which truthfully she only wears 'sometimes', she is relatively free of blemishes and imperfections with the exception of dark circles of fatigue around her eyes. You see, she makes a habit of not sleeping much or rather as much as she would like to. Often up until late, late hours when she finally does snooze it's closer to dawn than hoped for and results in the telltale signs of fatigue associated with that. A little bit of cream and concealer and most are none the wiser, but if you catch her without makeup, this flaw is obvious.
Beyond the face, her silhouette is that of a swimmer with well defined but not bulky muscles. Strong thighs atop long legs and sculpted deltoids being the two most prominent areas. Despite her warrior's body she is still a creature of womanly curves. Although her workout regimen requires that she keep the loose-hanging clothing to a minimum, the tight form-fitting body-suits and her modified uniform leave no doubt that she posses both cleavage and a posterior. In short, Amara is just a couple steps shy of an almost Amazonian build.
With regard to body language, Amara stands with a noble and almost regal demeanor. Straightened back, shoulders pushed back and square, chin up; she's worked long and hard at capturing an aura of authority and class from which she can see all things happening around her. Although her gaze can be stern thanks to the hard lines of her jaw, she is prone to showing the most subtle of smirks in the corner of her mouth for whatever private reason entertains her.
Her movements are marked with a distinct fluidity: Amara does not enter a room, she sweeps into it as if she owned it, and this is doubly true when she wields her blade—her style is almost dancelike, flow and balance impeccable, but there is an ever-present undercurrent of savagery there half-hidden by her bubbly exterior. In the same way, her step is light and graceful but filled with intent: it wouldn’t be amiss to confuse her for a member of the Second Division or the Onmitsukido by the way she moved. Under her ladylike exterior lies a core of steel, unyielding and filled with resolve, and it shines through clearly in her body language.
As far as accessories go, Amara believes chiefly in the tasteful application of modest and elegant jewelry. A platinum thumb ring on her left hand and an interchangeable array of gold and silver bands are applied to a number of fingers each day. None of the stones have gems but they feature a substantially different style of band including some pieces of elaborate filigree. She is never caught without a choker around her neck, even when bathing. Her ears are a bit more decorated with earrings going beyond just simple metal studs. Each lobe is pierced but she additionally has multiple purely decorative piercings higher up including the helix. The earrings are lightly gemmed or stamped in various fun shapes like fairies or dogs and cats--These are a rare glimpse into her self-expression outside of her powers.
She wears a Zanpakutō on her left hip: Sakurazuki, a Katana. Her Captain's haori is always impeccably clean and bordering on impossibly vibrant in color. Although she's never confirmed it, it's speculated among some that Captain Tamagawa's energy itself is responsible for the enhanced and saturated colors remaining as they are. The outer haori is standard issue and unmodified, but the clothing underneath has been more or less replaced by a tight, light robe not that disimilar to a bodysuit. Although the robe does have sleeves they are only 3/4 length as Amara feels this interferes less with her swing and other gestures. And what the Captain wants, the Captain gets. Within reasons.
Amara's aura and spiritual presence is, in a word, vibrant. A delirious bouquet of pastels, neons, and other rich and bright colors splatter against her surroundings like Jackson Pollack at a rave. Despite the vibrancy of the colors, the aura itself is a far colder thing than someone would expect based on that description. A distant, silent thing that radiates a sort of hopeless peace. Like staring up at the sky and the wide, wide galaxy above and coming to an understanding of just how small you are in comparison to the vast expanses between the stars. Yeah, a bit heavy. But apt.
PERSONALITY:
DISLIKES:
1 -- Indifference: One of the greatest signs of weakness a person can give off is either the refusal to take a side or the naivetee to think you are not best served by taking one. Sometimes, yes, that side is "neither" but it should still be a choice. Because of this, she encourages others to critically examine a great many issues, even at the cost of other things they should be doing that might rank more important. It's really important to know where you stand. What you fight for.
2 -- Quitting: Why would you stop after coming this far? If you were not committed to seeing a thing through, you never should have begun in the first place! To be fair, sometimes the natural conclusion of a thing is that you will lose and loses should be cut. But, there's no reason to stop fighting so long as you have the strength to keep going.
3 -- Excuses: Hand in hand with her dislike of people giving up, excuses are a great source of frustration for the Captain. While some things are excuseable, an excuse itself almost never is. It's far better to admit failure and own the reasons for your failure as a tool for self-improvement, but to put an excuse between you and the truth? That's the fastest way to get cut down and repeat your mistakes.
4 -- Academics: Yes it's necessary for a lot of things to simply have 'know how', but it's also tedious and stressful. And there's so much to know and remember and keep getting tested on that it's just not a good use of time. Why study and cram for things that you won't need? This is dumb...
5 -- Stink: If something offends your sight you can turn around, or close your eyes, or a number of other ways to simply not look at it. If something sounds bad you can cover your ears, or yell to cover it up yourself. But stink...stinky stink chokes the air and clings to clothing. It permeates everything in a big dumb cloud like some morbid haze that turns the stomach.
6 -- Cold Weather: Some people are just naturally suited to agree with one climate over the other and Amara is one of those people. She becomes genuinely miserable in the cold or when it's cold enough that she is forced to cover up. This is not to say that she minds a nice crisp or chilly night, no, she can handle that just fine. But when the air is cold enough you can see your breath or when snow starts to fall she takes serious issue with Mother Nature's bullshit.
7 -- Selfishness: Sharing is, quite literally caring. Captain Tamagawa expects all of her soldiers to make sure everyone has enough to go around before anyone even thinks about doubling up. Letting her witness you take more than a reasonable or adequate share (without good reason) is an express ticket to her bad side.
8 -- Spineless Diplomacy: When you are upset, you should voice that. When you like something, you should voice that. There are times for decorum and times to keep your cards close to your chest, so to speak, but those are tactics. The spirit behind things like diplomacy needs to be honest and forthright one even when--or perhaps especially when--you're among your betters. This is distinctly different from cowardice because that's at least an honest move even if it's to run away like a little bitch.
9 -- YA Novels: Given her love of literature, she finds these to be childish tripe in its worst form. It plays into juvenile fantasy and undeveloped emotions and emotional responses. Amara is certainly aware that there are plenty of reasons to indulge your inner child or let loose a bit with some facile and frivolous ventures...but you can do better than this. Go play a board game, or dance with friends. Hell, even a rom-com would be better.
10 -- Bluster: It's one thing to be cocky but blustering it's asking for Fate, Karma, some sort of cosmic force to rise up and smack you the hell down for running your mouth. Actions speak louder than words, always. Always. Plus, is there any benefit to disrespecting an opponent? If they survive you've made a far greater enemy with significantly more motivation than if you had simply allowed them to crawl away and lick their wounds.
11 -- Country Music: All the dances look the same. All the melodies sound the same. Sure, there are a few reasonable power ballads but hey, Faith Hill transcends genres. Cowboy hats are dumb, flannel is dumb, cowboy boots are dumb. Country music can get bent.
12 -- Vandenreich: The abberation against balance is the very definition of a universal problem. Pitying them is fine but it's a pathetic attempt to address the problem. You shouldn't pity them, you should act to stop them. The divine mandate of the Gotei is remove cancers like the Vandenerich, for the good of the Balance, for the good of the Soul Society.
LIKES:
1 -- A Good Book: Windows into the imagination or other worlds uncountable and strange! Literature is the second most perfect vessal ever created for transporting a willing and open mind into another realm. Amara has a vast book collection made up almost entirely of novels, novellas, and short-story anthologies. While she is not an afficianado regarding authors, she does know and few and can talk about some of them if pressed. It may seem strange to separate the author from the work, but she truly cares for the product more than the story behind it.
2 -- Visual Arts: Speaking of perfect vessals for transporting the open mind...Dance, painting, sculpture, and all the other visual mediums for art are her favorite forms of expression. Her home and office contain lots and lots of works of art collected from a long life lived in pursuit of their beauty. What's more, art seems to be the one thing that her Zanpakuto leaves untouched, although she is uncertain if that's an agreement reached between them subconsciously or if her own will overpowers the effect.
3 -- Starry Nights: Some of her favorite memories are surrendering to the endless starry abyss of the heavens and just feeling small. In an impossibly dense sea of people that stretches on what feels forever, it's nice to be reminded that there are still bigger things. No matter what ranks she climbs, the universe doesn't give a shit.
4 -- Mind-Altering Drugs: 'Altered Perception' is kind of her thing and she enjoys taking all sorts of substances recreationally. But, as she would advocate, repsonsibly above all else. In fact, she advocates that everyone should experience something like it at least once (if not regularly). Among her social group she is famous (or infamous) for leading 'spritual retreats' over long weekends.
5 -- Empathy: It's easy, and sometimes necessary, to turn emotion and sensibility off in order to survive in this line of work. Even Amara does it. But, when not at war there must be a time for any person to let their guard down and allow themselves to feel. To feel the emotions of others, to feel the emotion of the troops, the nation, the world itself. A good person should be ready to offer a shoulder to cry on just as easily as they are ready to offer a sword for war. Having said that, read the damn room.
6 -- Cherry Blossoms: The simplistic beauty of the white, rose, and pink blossoms captivates both her senses and her imagination. She often models her fashion sense after these Japanese main-stays and tries to pay subtle tribute to the motif whenever possible through jewelry and accent. Almost all of her sashes are colored or patterned after the blossoms and she wears these year round, regardless of blossom season.
7 -- Nagiri: Her preferred method of consuming food, you'll find some nagiri set at her table for virtually every meal she has influence over. While she wouldn't go so far as to turn into a diva if this form of sushi was not provided for her, she absolutely would put it on the menu if asked. She is open to consuming this food in just about any presentation. And while food that someone else made with love always tastes better, she is fully capable (and often does) of producing some for herself. Independence is important.
8 -- Absurdity: So much of life is damn and deadly serious. There really is no reasonable or foreseeable way to survive the thing without grabbing on to the life-raft that is absurdity. Appreciate the humor of circumstance and chance found among the pain. Appreciate the insane confluences of chance and happenstance that put you where you are. Laugh. Smile. Appreciate. You will be crushed beneath the bootheel of time, so you should get your money's worth.
9 -- Basketball: A classically American passtime, Amara has always enjoyed watching, playing, and learning about basketball. It's not that she's extremely gifted at the sport but rather that the athletic display and the accompaniyng strategies speak to her on a personal level. There's really nowhere to hide on a basketball court, someone wanting to play needs to be effective on both offense and defense in harmony with a small team working toward the same goal. This one just happens to involve a lot less death than her normal job, and that's a good thing. She enjoys NBA and College basketball with equal vigor.
10 -- Tattoos: Owning only a few very small ones herself, Amara deeply appreciates the commitment to a design and message so much to put it permanently on your body. Tattoos tell a story in the most beautiful and intimate way. She loves learning about tattoo and the stories that go with them.
11 --Strong Leadership: It is a defining quality that is, truly, necessary for every group to have. Although she counts herself among leadership, she also enjoys other qualified and capable people calling the shots from time to time. Furthermore, seeing inspiration in the eyes of onlookers is a tremendous professional and personal reward for her. It's a dangerous road to walk between instilling confidence and belief and filling a group with false hope however. Be a person who can walk that line, and you'll have immediately earned her respect.
12 -- Stargazing: It's good to feel small and appreciate the beauty of the night every bit as much as you would appreciate the glory of the day. So many unique shades and tones lurk in the skies and corners of the night, too. You should really stop and enjoy; do not fear the darkness.
FLAWS:
1 -- The Dreamer: Listed first as it's her chief flaw, Amara is a Dreamer first and foremost. She simply does not see the world as it is (at least anymore) but rather sees it for what it could be or what she wishes it might be. People, places, things are in a constant state of change and growth. Why not reality as well? Prone to fits of reverie, misunderstood perceptions, and occasional lapses in focus.
2 -- Abandon: Falling short of reckless, Amara rarely if ever stops once she genuinely commits to doing something. This often leads to her becoming overcommitted or overinvested in certain things, pouring unreasonable amounts of time and focus into things that call for much less. During times of war, she relies heavily on officers and other strategists to help her plan and apply her strength so she can avoid this trap.
3 -- Inarticulate: It's not that Amara has trouble finding the words, it's that she has trouble finding and sharing the right words. This is why her Zanpakuto is so important to her; it enables her to share her thoughts via beautiful visual displays and created environments (even if temporary) that allow complex thoughts that her word salad won't. Another side effect of this is her becoming frustrated with her inability to speak well and resorting to noises and gestures that normally only more deeply confuse her communication partner.
4 -- Shameless: While Amara knows and can recognize that some parts of her need improving or are not great on their surface or to other observers, she also recognizes that it's not up to other people trying to judge her or steer her in specific directions. She will evolve how she sees fit. If you deem a flaw or an imperfection and she doesn't agree, she will shamelessly flaunt the 'problem' right back in your face. This can obviously be very off-putting to people who don't know her or who are naturally more judgmental.
5 -- Frivolous: Amara enjoys vices and the routines that come along with them. Playing drinking games, offering opponent's sporting chances, entertaining ridiculous pleas from subordinates and making them into even further games. All of these things add up to a convoluted collection of personal rules that she can get away with imposing or using simply because she is the one with the upper hand in the power dynamic in her Division. And in places where she isn't? She uses these same rules to try to engage other people and bring them into the party. What's the worst they can do? Say no?
6 -- Socially Lubricated: What's that old saying? "Well behaved women rarely make history" or something like that? Besides, in a divison of truly career soldiers, what kind of leader would she be if she couldn't share a drink with the boys, flit between tables, and win some drinking games now and again?
HABITS:
1 -- Karaoke: Pop, hip hop, a bit of rock...She's liable to be singing something virtually any time she gets engaged on a task that requires less than her full concentration. Alternatively, she also sings when she's genuinely having fun; a mixed blessing for her opponents as she pummels them into submission while trying to harmonize some Ariana Grande.
2 -- Yoga: Amara has long embraced this fitness habit and is happy to tell you that it was a critical part of her life long before its sudden boom in Western culture. Every morning she practices a ritual of stretches and flexibility training through Yoga and then rounds it out with some light kata from a martial art of choice. It centers her and starts the sweating right away: what's not to love?
3 -- Reverse-punctuality: Amara is classically late. The type of person you would joke will be late to their own funeral. While not egregious, per se, she has consistetly and pretty much forever been about 5 minutes, maybe 10, late to everything she's ever been scheduled for. This is a byproduct of her aloof, head-in-the-clouds nature as well as her own aversion for the banality of clocks and timepieces. She is not interested in breaking this habit, despite her peer's best efforts.
4 -- Foodie: The treats, meals, and snacks are a thing of wonder and Amara loves to experience them all! She likes to imagine that, if she were given a go at that whole 'Human Life' thing, she would become a youtube internet sensation for her cooking and mukbang channels that feature lots of travel and lots of good food. The fastest way to understand how a human feels about life is to watch how they care (or dont care) about eating. Meals are an honest exchange, as are the foods that come with them.
5 -- Informal: Amara preaches commeraderie among her peers whenever she can and typically only dons pomp and circumstance when she has to. She allows officers to speak to her informally and talk about what is on their minds and in return she often does the same. While respect is important and appreciated, least disrespect become a casual option, she is not going to string people up for forgetting to use titles and honorifics in the right place and cadence.
6 -- Ignoring Boundaries: Over the years several complaints have been lodged about Amara's habit of taking something and leaving a note behind. She is a firm believer in "ask for forgiveness, not permission" and practices this regularly. Of course, she tries her best to not let this be a double-standard but sometimes it does become one. Things always seem different when you are the target.
FEARS:
1 -- Being Normal: Chiefly, she is comforted by how bizarre and weird her life and her perspective are. At an earlier part of her life she would have been afraid of how alien things could be and how she might be perceived or remembered by others. But now, when she compares what she has been through, what she sees, what she feels, what she imagines to the timelines and thoughts of others? She is truly grateful. To lose this would be the death of her.
2 -- Artistic Rejection: It's perfectly okay for a piece of art to be "not for" someone, or for the emotions a piece drums up to be received with a confused face and reactive anger. But genuine rejection of her artistic expression is a deep and personal wound for this creative soul. Anyone who offends as such will not be soon forgotten. If she were the type of person to hold grudges, this is the sort of folk they would be reserved for.
3 -- Ugliness: Aesthetics, artistry, whatever name you want to dress it up with she is a bit vain and has become accustomed to her life just so. To lose her beauty or to be trapped within square boring walls with square boring people is a great fear. This is tied closely with her worries about losing her power or having her imaginative influences taken away from her.
4 -- Genuine Insanity: Sometimes when she touches the furthest reaches of her Zanpakuto's abilities and her own comprehension, she worries she may not come back. A step, just one single step, too far would see her wave collapse back into the ocean and she would be lost forever. Sometimes, the lucidity she clings to in her daydreams seems more distant than others. Amara fears that one day she will simply stop noticing the dream. There's power in owning that fear, but at what price?
GOALS:
1 -- Protection: It's right in the job description, after all. As the Captain of the Primary Defense Squad it is her duty to minimize casualties on the home front and prepare the Seireitei to a state of readiness at all times. Zero deaths is the number she wishes to see among her forces each and every day, in good times and in bad.
2 -- War Hero: Privately she'll admit to desperately wanting to live out this fantasy. She would dare not speak it outloud because to see it fulfilled would require putting tens or hundreds of thousands of souls at risk, but, she wishes for her moment in the sun to find her one day. A soldier with a cause. A great victory with an equally great purpose. It is only in the quest to defeat the utmost evil that we can truly find just how good we can be.
3 -- Find Rinoa: Her childhood best friend taken from her many many decades ago, Amara yearns to be reunited with the only person to ever truly give her a feeling of completeness. Somewhere, she is out there. Perhaps the years were unkind and she was reincarnated but perhaps not. And if she succumbed to corruption and is now a Hollow? There's no hiding among the dunes of Hueco Mundo.
4 -- Partner in Crime: Amara is under no delusions that she is anything but a hot mess in an haori, but she holds out hope that the comfort and permanance of a true family might one day be waiting for her. A loving partner who understands and can handle her eccentricities while providing plenty of their own for her to love right back. This isn't necessarily a romantic love leading to marriage, but rather a soul to entwine with that speaks directly to her own. Ever since she lost her husband, this has been on her mind.
5 -- Create Rules: Don't get this twisted. She doesn't want to make laws. It's her secret and private goal to be the reason that certain laws now exist on the books. Antics and exploits so epic that they warp the laws of society around her. Now that would be a fun mark to leave. Some young naive Shinigami asking why a rule exists, and the curt and tired reply of the Officer speaking to them is, "Because Amara exists..."
ALIGNMENT:
Chaotic Good -- Amara acts as her conscience directs her to rather than following what is expected of her. She attempts to 'do her best' by the virtues she ascribes to and, with only very rare exception, let's laws and other people's morality stop her from her course of action. She doesn't strike the defenseless unless absolutely necessary and will not intentionally harm an innocent if it can ever be helped. In spite of this generally 'good' demeanor, she is not at all above lying in order to advance what she believes needs to be done. Freedom, above all else, underscores her agenda. Amara looks to perform good acts in the service of others to alleviate their suffering whether that be because of intentional malice or random acts that may have befallen them.
OVERALL PERSONALITY:
Tamagawa Amara is case study of dichotomy: Equal parts deadly serious and stunningly mad.
Thanks in part to the point of view 'forced' upon her by her Zanpakuto, reality is never quite as it seems. While she finds this at times deeply grating, frustrating, and problematic it is also her greatest source of inspiration and relaxation. Her moods vassilate so often, alternating playful and stern, because her point of view can often prevent her from seeing things the way she knows that she needs to be seeing them in the moment. Imagine a faded overlap of a Spongebob Squarepants episode laid atop a nature documentary about the African Savannah. While this does not constantly happen, despite her level of control it happens often enough. If anything her experiences have made it 'worse' for her to process in the long-term as her resolve to fight it has been beaten down.
On a less depressing and more personal level, as Amara grew up and came into her own she took great enjoyment in lots of active running and playing for virutally her entire childhood. There were few if any challenges she ever shied away from whether they be foot races, arm wrestling, hot pepper eating, you name it. A favorite target for neighborhood boys to try rattling and tormenting, she developed a tomboyish edge in order to survive the realities of her youth. But in more modern times and well after securing her self-confidence, she has gladly seen to it that her innately feminine nature has once again had a chance to blossom. The two of these remain closley married together; she is more than happy to put her hair back in a ponytail and get as dirty as it takes to get shit done.
The traits that primarily define her to others are her outgoing pursuit of personal relationships, the desire to make sure everyone has a chance to get in on the fun, and unwavering confidence in her own vision even as the vision changes in real time. She has taken great care to establish herself as a rock for her squadmates, whether or not her rank reflects that social standing, both in the field and in the barracks. Amara likes the camaraderie, the talking and joking, the times together working on neat projects...Because without those to steal her focus? Her potentially crippling issues begin to bubble to the surface.
To her friends, Ms. Tamagawa is something like the life of the party. She is the first one to pick up the mic and jam, the first one to suggest pic sessions, the first one to order shots, talk to that table of boys, hang her upper body out the open window, etc. She's wild and free and uninhibited but this sense of freedom she values can come at the price of other's comfort. It's not like she has toggle switches or dials or other things that turn the knobs up and down and sometimes that can be a lot for people to handle. Downright exhausting to the unprepared. Amara is aware of this and she tries to pace herself whenever she can keep it on the forefront of her mind. Unfortunately, once she starts rolling there is very little stopping her--including herself.
Professionally, Amara finds pleasure in enjoying the simple and day to day things present in her life. She enjoys visiting offices, checking on her officers, watching training and hearing how this and that is improving and so and so Shinigami are trending upward on their way to a promotion. This isn't to say she takes a vested and deep interest in each and every word coming from her officer's mouths, as insulting as that might sound at first read. But rather, being engaged in conversation about current events warms her and fuels her desire to continue to make change in the world around her. She trusts her officers, otherwise they wouldn't be officers, so when they say someone is good or bad she empowers them to act on that and make moves that are needed for the safety of all. Sometimes this trust is reward very well, sometimes it's not. As the years have gone on, she's learned to get it right more and more and her failures or mistakes become less and less frequent.
Privately, away from the public, Amara is plagued by a lack of validation and a deep-seated desire to acquire it. In these times of strife, many of her heroic deeds have gone unrecognized given how many people may have died before they could share the stories of her efforts. It has definitely left a chip on her shoulder and she feels the desire to be recognized for her accomplishments growing inside of her. As an obvious result of her job, success is not measured by the amount of lives saved but rather the number that were unfortunately allowed to die. No matter how diligently she works to keep that number low, the types of things she gets involved with ensures it is never going to be zero.
As far as her Captain-peers and her Commander are concerned, Amara has always done a fine job for the Gotei. She completes her assigned tasks and objectives but cares substantially more about doing right by her brothers and sisters in the Division than by her Commander. Thankfully, those two goals often overlap in service of the defense fo the Seireitei. Having had no evolving relationship with any sort of parents for multiple centuries now, she is always open to the positive influence of a mentor somewhere in her life. Given her rank, the places that mentor might come from have done nothing but shrink oven time.
In combat Amara, much like her personality, is a wonky blend of the absurd and the serious. Making grand and indirect use of terrain and circumstance, all the world is a stage when she chooses to engage an unfortunate target. Although she is both experienced and practiced at fighting in squad tactics, when she knows it is a time she must buckle down and get serious she insists on dismissing all but her strongest allies from the vicinity; her Zanpakuto is far too unpredictable and wild a risk to take with those that have not learned to ride it out.
All of this squishes together to paint the picture of a woman who is not pulled in many directions, but rather chooses to grow in many directions at once. She is fluid. Like paint slopped on an easel she runs wherever she feels like running, blending whatever colors she happens to bump into and integrating them into her life. She's a soldier, a friend, a dreamer, a lover, a passionate artist, a daring athlete, a caring mother. But between those lines, at the places where each of those roles overlap, there is the a genuine person who lives all the crazy shit life has to offer. And she will crush anyone that dares threaten that into a fine paste.
--"All the things we've forgotten scream for help in dreams"
**Character Theme**
ESSENTIALS:
Discord Name: PineappleOnPizza#1261
Password 1: Black Hole
Password 2: Moon Pray
Character Type: "Permanent Release"
Squad: 10th Division, Primary Defense Squad
Rank: Captain
DEMOGRAPHICS:
Name: Tamagawa, Amara
Nicknames: 'Red Foot'
Age of Death: Amara was born as a Pure Soul
Real Age / Apparent Age: 380, appearing ~28
Birthday (Monday/Day): August 4th
Birthplace: Rukongai District 8
Blood Type: O+
Roleplay Sample Included here.
The young boy puffed up his chest at the question and started explaining himself, but it didn’t take long before Amara cut him short, the words dying in his throat.
"No."
All it took was that single syllable and it seemed like the young man in front of her deflated back into a boy, robbed entirely of whatever it was that had kept him afloat thus far. In itself, it was a good indication Amara's arguably kneejerk reaction had been the correct one. The proper response to setbacks in Amara Tamagawa's 'little family' was not to let them blindside you. It was to turn around and demolish them.
"But why," came the plaintive bewilderment at last, and Amara could only shake her head.
"I don’t have to have a reason." The bubbly affectation in her voice making it all the worse and crushing those last bits of optimism the boy had left.
"There’s no way you don’t have a reason!"
She pursed her lips in silent thought for a moment, then inhaled.
"Your street gang was the first place I went to for help when this task force was formed. Half of the people in that warehouse were old members of the other major gangs in your neighborhood, which made it the logical place to start. You’re not an accomplished ganger, or else you wouldn’t be here today. You also didn’t take the offer to leave those boys in favor of what I offer when it was first given, which in itself tells me a lot about you: you hesitated the first time, and you’ve been second-guessing that choice ever since. Now you’ve finally realized you’re fed up with their small-time efforts and are looking for greener pastures elsewhere and are hoping that I will accommodate you."
She took a step closer to her interviewee, touching two fingers to his chest, right above his heart. "If your reaction just now is any indication, I’m willing to bet that much of what I’ll find in here is half-measures and lack of follow-through. That’s not what I’m looking for."
Her vibrant indigo eyes bored into his dull gray ones, as if challenging him to act.
"This thing of mine is by design small, but it’s made up of those who are very, very good at taking care of their family no matter the costs, no matter the risks. You are small, but you’re a far cry from good. Thus I am formally denying your request to join. Goodbye."
"No."
All it took was that single syllable and it seemed like the young man in front of her deflated back into a boy, robbed entirely of whatever it was that had kept him afloat thus far. In itself, it was a good indication Amara's arguably kneejerk reaction had been the correct one. The proper response to setbacks in Amara Tamagawa's 'little family' was not to let them blindside you. It was to turn around and demolish them.
"But why," came the plaintive bewilderment at last, and Amara could only shake her head.
"I don’t have to have a reason." The bubbly affectation in her voice making it all the worse and crushing those last bits of optimism the boy had left.
"There’s no way you don’t have a reason!"
She pursed her lips in silent thought for a moment, then inhaled.
"Your street gang was the first place I went to for help when this task force was formed. Half of the people in that warehouse were old members of the other major gangs in your neighborhood, which made it the logical place to start. You’re not an accomplished ganger, or else you wouldn’t be here today. You also didn’t take the offer to leave those boys in favor of what I offer when it was first given, which in itself tells me a lot about you: you hesitated the first time, and you’ve been second-guessing that choice ever since. Now you’ve finally realized you’re fed up with their small-time efforts and are looking for greener pastures elsewhere and are hoping that I will accommodate you."
She took a step closer to her interviewee, touching two fingers to his chest, right above his heart. "If your reaction just now is any indication, I’m willing to bet that much of what I’ll find in here is half-measures and lack of follow-through. That’s not what I’m looking for."
Her vibrant indigo eyes bored into his dull gray ones, as if challenging him to act.
"This thing of mine is by design small, but it’s made up of those who are very, very good at taking care of their family no matter the costs, no matter the risks. You are small, but you’re a far cry from good. Thus I am formally denying your request to join. Goodbye."
APPEARANCE:
Height: 6'0 or 182cm
Weight: 125lbs or 58kg
Eye Color: Indigo/Blue
Hair Color: Blonde, almost Platinum
Amara is a fit and athletic woman appearing to be in her mid-late twenties. Her medium length blonde hair is most often left down and left to lazy beach curls, although you're just as likely to find it pulled back into a ponytail when she gets to work. In the midday sun it gleans silvery almost platinum. Her lips, full and slightly pouty, are most often adorned with either feminine and light colors like cotton-candy pink, or darker and more sultry colors like cherry red. Her eyes, naturally marbled and vibrant indigo, are set behind smokey eyeliner and eye-shadow blue and purple in tone. Her irises deepen and intensify in color as she uses her powers or channels her energy through her well-muscled form.
Amara's complexion is nearly flawless and is complemented by only the most basic application of foundation, toner, and blush to round out the look. Even without the makeup, which truthfully she only wears 'sometimes', she is relatively free of blemishes and imperfections with the exception of dark circles of fatigue around her eyes. You see, she makes a habit of not sleeping much or rather as much as she would like to. Often up until late, late hours when she finally does snooze it's closer to dawn than hoped for and results in the telltale signs of fatigue associated with that. A little bit of cream and concealer and most are none the wiser, but if you catch her without makeup, this flaw is obvious.
Beyond the face, her silhouette is that of a swimmer with well defined but not bulky muscles. Strong thighs atop long legs and sculpted deltoids being the two most prominent areas. Despite her warrior's body she is still a creature of womanly curves. Although her workout regimen requires that she keep the loose-hanging clothing to a minimum, the tight form-fitting body-suits and her modified uniform leave no doubt that she posses both cleavage and a posterior. In short, Amara is just a couple steps shy of an almost Amazonian build.
With regard to body language, Amara stands with a noble and almost regal demeanor. Straightened back, shoulders pushed back and square, chin up; she's worked long and hard at capturing an aura of authority and class from which she can see all things happening around her. Although her gaze can be stern thanks to the hard lines of her jaw, she is prone to showing the most subtle of smirks in the corner of her mouth for whatever private reason entertains her.
Her movements are marked with a distinct fluidity: Amara does not enter a room, she sweeps into it as if she owned it, and this is doubly true when she wields her blade—her style is almost dancelike, flow and balance impeccable, but there is an ever-present undercurrent of savagery there half-hidden by her bubbly exterior. In the same way, her step is light and graceful but filled with intent: it wouldn’t be amiss to confuse her for a member of the Second Division or the Onmitsukido by the way she moved. Under her ladylike exterior lies a core of steel, unyielding and filled with resolve, and it shines through clearly in her body language.
As far as accessories go, Amara believes chiefly in the tasteful application of modest and elegant jewelry. A platinum thumb ring on her left hand and an interchangeable array of gold and silver bands are applied to a number of fingers each day. None of the stones have gems but they feature a substantially different style of band including some pieces of elaborate filigree. She is never caught without a choker around her neck, even when bathing. Her ears are a bit more decorated with earrings going beyond just simple metal studs. Each lobe is pierced but she additionally has multiple purely decorative piercings higher up including the helix. The earrings are lightly gemmed or stamped in various fun shapes like fairies or dogs and cats--These are a rare glimpse into her self-expression outside of her powers.
She wears a Zanpakutō on her left hip: Sakurazuki, a Katana. Her Captain's haori is always impeccably clean and bordering on impossibly vibrant in color. Although she's never confirmed it, it's speculated among some that Captain Tamagawa's energy itself is responsible for the enhanced and saturated colors remaining as they are. The outer haori is standard issue and unmodified, but the clothing underneath has been more or less replaced by a tight, light robe not that disimilar to a bodysuit. Although the robe does have sleeves they are only 3/4 length as Amara feels this interferes less with her swing and other gestures. And what the Captain wants, the Captain gets. Within reasons.
Amara's aura and spiritual presence is, in a word, vibrant. A delirious bouquet of pastels, neons, and other rich and bright colors splatter against her surroundings like Jackson Pollack at a rave. Despite the vibrancy of the colors, the aura itself is a far colder thing than someone would expect based on that description. A distant, silent thing that radiates a sort of hopeless peace. Like staring up at the sky and the wide, wide galaxy above and coming to an understanding of just how small you are in comparison to the vast expanses between the stars. Yeah, a bit heavy. But apt.
PERSONALITY:
DISLIKES:
1 -- Indifference: One of the greatest signs of weakness a person can give off is either the refusal to take a side or the naivetee to think you are not best served by taking one. Sometimes, yes, that side is "neither" but it should still be a choice. Because of this, she encourages others to critically examine a great many issues, even at the cost of other things they should be doing that might rank more important. It's really important to know where you stand. What you fight for.
2 -- Quitting: Why would you stop after coming this far? If you were not committed to seeing a thing through, you never should have begun in the first place! To be fair, sometimes the natural conclusion of a thing is that you will lose and loses should be cut. But, there's no reason to stop fighting so long as you have the strength to keep going.
3 -- Excuses: Hand in hand with her dislike of people giving up, excuses are a great source of frustration for the Captain. While some things are excuseable, an excuse itself almost never is. It's far better to admit failure and own the reasons for your failure as a tool for self-improvement, but to put an excuse between you and the truth? That's the fastest way to get cut down and repeat your mistakes.
4 -- Academics: Yes it's necessary for a lot of things to simply have 'know how', but it's also tedious and stressful. And there's so much to know and remember and keep getting tested on that it's just not a good use of time. Why study and cram for things that you won't need? This is dumb...
5 -- Stink: If something offends your sight you can turn around, or close your eyes, or a number of other ways to simply not look at it. If something sounds bad you can cover your ears, or yell to cover it up yourself. But stink...stinky stink chokes the air and clings to clothing. It permeates everything in a big dumb cloud like some morbid haze that turns the stomach.
6 -- Cold Weather: Some people are just naturally suited to agree with one climate over the other and Amara is one of those people. She becomes genuinely miserable in the cold or when it's cold enough that she is forced to cover up. This is not to say that she minds a nice crisp or chilly night, no, she can handle that just fine. But when the air is cold enough you can see your breath or when snow starts to fall she takes serious issue with Mother Nature's bullshit.
7 -- Selfishness: Sharing is, quite literally caring. Captain Tamagawa expects all of her soldiers to make sure everyone has enough to go around before anyone even thinks about doubling up. Letting her witness you take more than a reasonable or adequate share (without good reason) is an express ticket to her bad side.
8 -- Spineless Diplomacy: When you are upset, you should voice that. When you like something, you should voice that. There are times for decorum and times to keep your cards close to your chest, so to speak, but those are tactics. The spirit behind things like diplomacy needs to be honest and forthright one even when--or perhaps especially when--you're among your betters. This is distinctly different from cowardice because that's at least an honest move even if it's to run away like a little bitch.
9 -- YA Novels: Given her love of literature, she finds these to be childish tripe in its worst form. It plays into juvenile fantasy and undeveloped emotions and emotional responses. Amara is certainly aware that there are plenty of reasons to indulge your inner child or let loose a bit with some facile and frivolous ventures...but you can do better than this. Go play a board game, or dance with friends. Hell, even a rom-com would be better.
10 -- Bluster: It's one thing to be cocky but blustering it's asking for Fate, Karma, some sort of cosmic force to rise up and smack you the hell down for running your mouth. Actions speak louder than words, always. Always. Plus, is there any benefit to disrespecting an opponent? If they survive you've made a far greater enemy with significantly more motivation than if you had simply allowed them to crawl away and lick their wounds.
11 -- Country Music: All the dances look the same. All the melodies sound the same. Sure, there are a few reasonable power ballads but hey, Faith Hill transcends genres. Cowboy hats are dumb, flannel is dumb, cowboy boots are dumb. Country music can get bent.
12 -- Vandenreich: The abberation against balance is the very definition of a universal problem. Pitying them is fine but it's a pathetic attempt to address the problem. You shouldn't pity them, you should act to stop them. The divine mandate of the Gotei is remove cancers like the Vandenerich, for the good of the Balance, for the good of the Soul Society.
LIKES:
1 -- A Good Book: Windows into the imagination or other worlds uncountable and strange! Literature is the second most perfect vessal ever created for transporting a willing and open mind into another realm. Amara has a vast book collection made up almost entirely of novels, novellas, and short-story anthologies. While she is not an afficianado regarding authors, she does know and few and can talk about some of them if pressed. It may seem strange to separate the author from the work, but she truly cares for the product more than the story behind it.
2 -- Visual Arts: Speaking of perfect vessals for transporting the open mind...Dance, painting, sculpture, and all the other visual mediums for art are her favorite forms of expression. Her home and office contain lots and lots of works of art collected from a long life lived in pursuit of their beauty. What's more, art seems to be the one thing that her Zanpakuto leaves untouched, although she is uncertain if that's an agreement reached between them subconsciously or if her own will overpowers the effect.
3 -- Starry Nights: Some of her favorite memories are surrendering to the endless starry abyss of the heavens and just feeling small. In an impossibly dense sea of people that stretches on what feels forever, it's nice to be reminded that there are still bigger things. No matter what ranks she climbs, the universe doesn't give a shit.
4 -- Mind-Altering Drugs: 'Altered Perception' is kind of her thing and she enjoys taking all sorts of substances recreationally. But, as she would advocate, repsonsibly above all else. In fact, she advocates that everyone should experience something like it at least once (if not regularly). Among her social group she is famous (or infamous) for leading 'spritual retreats' over long weekends.
5 -- Empathy: It's easy, and sometimes necessary, to turn emotion and sensibility off in order to survive in this line of work. Even Amara does it. But, when not at war there must be a time for any person to let their guard down and allow themselves to feel. To feel the emotions of others, to feel the emotion of the troops, the nation, the world itself. A good person should be ready to offer a shoulder to cry on just as easily as they are ready to offer a sword for war. Having said that, read the damn room.
6 -- Cherry Blossoms: The simplistic beauty of the white, rose, and pink blossoms captivates both her senses and her imagination. She often models her fashion sense after these Japanese main-stays and tries to pay subtle tribute to the motif whenever possible through jewelry and accent. Almost all of her sashes are colored or patterned after the blossoms and she wears these year round, regardless of blossom season.
7 -- Nagiri: Her preferred method of consuming food, you'll find some nagiri set at her table for virtually every meal she has influence over. While she wouldn't go so far as to turn into a diva if this form of sushi was not provided for her, she absolutely would put it on the menu if asked. She is open to consuming this food in just about any presentation. And while food that someone else made with love always tastes better, she is fully capable (and often does) of producing some for herself. Independence is important.
8 -- Absurdity: So much of life is damn and deadly serious. There really is no reasonable or foreseeable way to survive the thing without grabbing on to the life-raft that is absurdity. Appreciate the humor of circumstance and chance found among the pain. Appreciate the insane confluences of chance and happenstance that put you where you are. Laugh. Smile. Appreciate. You will be crushed beneath the bootheel of time, so you should get your money's worth.
9 -- Basketball: A classically American passtime, Amara has always enjoyed watching, playing, and learning about basketball. It's not that she's extremely gifted at the sport but rather that the athletic display and the accompaniyng strategies speak to her on a personal level. There's really nowhere to hide on a basketball court, someone wanting to play needs to be effective on both offense and defense in harmony with a small team working toward the same goal. This one just happens to involve a lot less death than her normal job, and that's a good thing. She enjoys NBA and College basketball with equal vigor.
10 -- Tattoos: Owning only a few very small ones herself, Amara deeply appreciates the commitment to a design and message so much to put it permanently on your body. Tattoos tell a story in the most beautiful and intimate way. She loves learning about tattoo and the stories that go with them.
11 --Strong Leadership: It is a defining quality that is, truly, necessary for every group to have. Although she counts herself among leadership, she also enjoys other qualified and capable people calling the shots from time to time. Furthermore, seeing inspiration in the eyes of onlookers is a tremendous professional and personal reward for her. It's a dangerous road to walk between instilling confidence and belief and filling a group with false hope however. Be a person who can walk that line, and you'll have immediately earned her respect.
12 -- Stargazing: It's good to feel small and appreciate the beauty of the night every bit as much as you would appreciate the glory of the day. So many unique shades and tones lurk in the skies and corners of the night, too. You should really stop and enjoy; do not fear the darkness.
FLAWS:
1 -- The Dreamer: Listed first as it's her chief flaw, Amara is a Dreamer first and foremost. She simply does not see the world as it is (at least anymore) but rather sees it for what it could be or what she wishes it might be. People, places, things are in a constant state of change and growth. Why not reality as well? Prone to fits of reverie, misunderstood perceptions, and occasional lapses in focus.
2 -- Abandon: Falling short of reckless, Amara rarely if ever stops once she genuinely commits to doing something. This often leads to her becoming overcommitted or overinvested in certain things, pouring unreasonable amounts of time and focus into things that call for much less. During times of war, she relies heavily on officers and other strategists to help her plan and apply her strength so she can avoid this trap.
3 -- Inarticulate: It's not that Amara has trouble finding the words, it's that she has trouble finding and sharing the right words. This is why her Zanpakuto is so important to her; it enables her to share her thoughts via beautiful visual displays and created environments (even if temporary) that allow complex thoughts that her word salad won't. Another side effect of this is her becoming frustrated with her inability to speak well and resorting to noises and gestures that normally only more deeply confuse her communication partner.
4 -- Shameless: While Amara knows and can recognize that some parts of her need improving or are not great on their surface or to other observers, she also recognizes that it's not up to other people trying to judge her or steer her in specific directions. She will evolve how she sees fit. If you deem a flaw or an imperfection and she doesn't agree, she will shamelessly flaunt the 'problem' right back in your face. This can obviously be very off-putting to people who don't know her or who are naturally more judgmental.
5 -- Frivolous: Amara enjoys vices and the routines that come along with them. Playing drinking games, offering opponent's sporting chances, entertaining ridiculous pleas from subordinates and making them into even further games. All of these things add up to a convoluted collection of personal rules that she can get away with imposing or using simply because she is the one with the upper hand in the power dynamic in her Division. And in places where she isn't? She uses these same rules to try to engage other people and bring them into the party. What's the worst they can do? Say no?
6 -- Socially Lubricated: What's that old saying? "Well behaved women rarely make history" or something like that? Besides, in a divison of truly career soldiers, what kind of leader would she be if she couldn't share a drink with the boys, flit between tables, and win some drinking games now and again?
HABITS:
1 -- Karaoke: Pop, hip hop, a bit of rock...She's liable to be singing something virtually any time she gets engaged on a task that requires less than her full concentration. Alternatively, she also sings when she's genuinely having fun; a mixed blessing for her opponents as she pummels them into submission while trying to harmonize some Ariana Grande.
2 -- Yoga: Amara has long embraced this fitness habit and is happy to tell you that it was a critical part of her life long before its sudden boom in Western culture. Every morning she practices a ritual of stretches and flexibility training through Yoga and then rounds it out with some light kata from a martial art of choice. It centers her and starts the sweating right away: what's not to love?
3 -- Reverse-punctuality: Amara is classically late. The type of person you would joke will be late to their own funeral. While not egregious, per se, she has consistetly and pretty much forever been about 5 minutes, maybe 10, late to everything she's ever been scheduled for. This is a byproduct of her aloof, head-in-the-clouds nature as well as her own aversion for the banality of clocks and timepieces. She is not interested in breaking this habit, despite her peer's best efforts.
4 -- Foodie: The treats, meals, and snacks are a thing of wonder and Amara loves to experience them all! She likes to imagine that, if she were given a go at that whole 'Human Life' thing, she would become a youtube internet sensation for her cooking and mukbang channels that feature lots of travel and lots of good food. The fastest way to understand how a human feels about life is to watch how they care (or dont care) about eating. Meals are an honest exchange, as are the foods that come with them.
5 -- Informal: Amara preaches commeraderie among her peers whenever she can and typically only dons pomp and circumstance when she has to. She allows officers to speak to her informally and talk about what is on their minds and in return she often does the same. While respect is important and appreciated, least disrespect become a casual option, she is not going to string people up for forgetting to use titles and honorifics in the right place and cadence.
6 -- Ignoring Boundaries: Over the years several complaints have been lodged about Amara's habit of taking something and leaving a note behind. She is a firm believer in "ask for forgiveness, not permission" and practices this regularly. Of course, she tries her best to not let this be a double-standard but sometimes it does become one. Things always seem different when you are the target.
FEARS:
1 -- Being Normal: Chiefly, she is comforted by how bizarre and weird her life and her perspective are. At an earlier part of her life she would have been afraid of how alien things could be and how she might be perceived or remembered by others. But now, when she compares what she has been through, what she sees, what she feels, what she imagines to the timelines and thoughts of others? She is truly grateful. To lose this would be the death of her.
2 -- Artistic Rejection: It's perfectly okay for a piece of art to be "not for" someone, or for the emotions a piece drums up to be received with a confused face and reactive anger. But genuine rejection of her artistic expression is a deep and personal wound for this creative soul. Anyone who offends as such will not be soon forgotten. If she were the type of person to hold grudges, this is the sort of folk they would be reserved for.
3 -- Ugliness: Aesthetics, artistry, whatever name you want to dress it up with she is a bit vain and has become accustomed to her life just so. To lose her beauty or to be trapped within square boring walls with square boring people is a great fear. This is tied closely with her worries about losing her power or having her imaginative influences taken away from her.
4 -- Genuine Insanity: Sometimes when she touches the furthest reaches of her Zanpakuto's abilities and her own comprehension, she worries she may not come back. A step, just one single step, too far would see her wave collapse back into the ocean and she would be lost forever. Sometimes, the lucidity she clings to in her daydreams seems more distant than others. Amara fears that one day she will simply stop noticing the dream. There's power in owning that fear, but at what price?
GOALS:
1 -- Protection: It's right in the job description, after all. As the Captain of the Primary Defense Squad it is her duty to minimize casualties on the home front and prepare the Seireitei to a state of readiness at all times. Zero deaths is the number she wishes to see among her forces each and every day, in good times and in bad.
2 -- War Hero: Privately she'll admit to desperately wanting to live out this fantasy. She would dare not speak it outloud because to see it fulfilled would require putting tens or hundreds of thousands of souls at risk, but, she wishes for her moment in the sun to find her one day. A soldier with a cause. A great victory with an equally great purpose. It is only in the quest to defeat the utmost evil that we can truly find just how good we can be.
3 -- Find Rinoa: Her childhood best friend taken from her many many decades ago, Amara yearns to be reunited with the only person to ever truly give her a feeling of completeness. Somewhere, she is out there. Perhaps the years were unkind and she was reincarnated but perhaps not. And if she succumbed to corruption and is now a Hollow? There's no hiding among the dunes of Hueco Mundo.
4 -- Partner in Crime: Amara is under no delusions that she is anything but a hot mess in an haori, but she holds out hope that the comfort and permanance of a true family might one day be waiting for her. A loving partner who understands and can handle her eccentricities while providing plenty of their own for her to love right back. This isn't necessarily a romantic love leading to marriage, but rather a soul to entwine with that speaks directly to her own. Ever since she lost her husband, this has been on her mind.
5 -- Create Rules: Don't get this twisted. She doesn't want to make laws. It's her secret and private goal to be the reason that certain laws now exist on the books. Antics and exploits so epic that they warp the laws of society around her. Now that would be a fun mark to leave. Some young naive Shinigami asking why a rule exists, and the curt and tired reply of the Officer speaking to them is, "Because Amara exists..."
ALIGNMENT:
Chaotic Good -- Amara acts as her conscience directs her to rather than following what is expected of her. She attempts to 'do her best' by the virtues she ascribes to and, with only very rare exception, let's laws and other people's morality stop her from her course of action. She doesn't strike the defenseless unless absolutely necessary and will not intentionally harm an innocent if it can ever be helped. In spite of this generally 'good' demeanor, she is not at all above lying in order to advance what she believes needs to be done. Freedom, above all else, underscores her agenda. Amara looks to perform good acts in the service of others to alleviate their suffering whether that be because of intentional malice or random acts that may have befallen them.
OVERALL PERSONALITY:
Tamagawa Amara is case study of dichotomy: Equal parts deadly serious and stunningly mad.
Thanks in part to the point of view 'forced' upon her by her Zanpakuto, reality is never quite as it seems. While she finds this at times deeply grating, frustrating, and problematic it is also her greatest source of inspiration and relaxation. Her moods vassilate so often, alternating playful and stern, because her point of view can often prevent her from seeing things the way she knows that she needs to be seeing them in the moment. Imagine a faded overlap of a Spongebob Squarepants episode laid atop a nature documentary about the African Savannah. While this does not constantly happen, despite her level of control it happens often enough. If anything her experiences have made it 'worse' for her to process in the long-term as her resolve to fight it has been beaten down.
On a less depressing and more personal level, as Amara grew up and came into her own she took great enjoyment in lots of active running and playing for virutally her entire childhood. There were few if any challenges she ever shied away from whether they be foot races, arm wrestling, hot pepper eating, you name it. A favorite target for neighborhood boys to try rattling and tormenting, she developed a tomboyish edge in order to survive the realities of her youth. But in more modern times and well after securing her self-confidence, she has gladly seen to it that her innately feminine nature has once again had a chance to blossom. The two of these remain closley married together; she is more than happy to put her hair back in a ponytail and get as dirty as it takes to get shit done.
The traits that primarily define her to others are her outgoing pursuit of personal relationships, the desire to make sure everyone has a chance to get in on the fun, and unwavering confidence in her own vision even as the vision changes in real time. She has taken great care to establish herself as a rock for her squadmates, whether or not her rank reflects that social standing, both in the field and in the barracks. Amara likes the camaraderie, the talking and joking, the times together working on neat projects...Because without those to steal her focus? Her potentially crippling issues begin to bubble to the surface.
To her friends, Ms. Tamagawa is something like the life of the party. She is the first one to pick up the mic and jam, the first one to suggest pic sessions, the first one to order shots, talk to that table of boys, hang her upper body out the open window, etc. She's wild and free and uninhibited but this sense of freedom she values can come at the price of other's comfort. It's not like she has toggle switches or dials or other things that turn the knobs up and down and sometimes that can be a lot for people to handle. Downright exhausting to the unprepared. Amara is aware of this and she tries to pace herself whenever she can keep it on the forefront of her mind. Unfortunately, once she starts rolling there is very little stopping her--including herself.
Professionally, Amara finds pleasure in enjoying the simple and day to day things present in her life. She enjoys visiting offices, checking on her officers, watching training and hearing how this and that is improving and so and so Shinigami are trending upward on their way to a promotion. This isn't to say she takes a vested and deep interest in each and every word coming from her officer's mouths, as insulting as that might sound at first read. But rather, being engaged in conversation about current events warms her and fuels her desire to continue to make change in the world around her. She trusts her officers, otherwise they wouldn't be officers, so when they say someone is good or bad she empowers them to act on that and make moves that are needed for the safety of all. Sometimes this trust is reward very well, sometimes it's not. As the years have gone on, she's learned to get it right more and more and her failures or mistakes become less and less frequent.
Privately, away from the public, Amara is plagued by a lack of validation and a deep-seated desire to acquire it. In these times of strife, many of her heroic deeds have gone unrecognized given how many people may have died before they could share the stories of her efforts. It has definitely left a chip on her shoulder and she feels the desire to be recognized for her accomplishments growing inside of her. As an obvious result of her job, success is not measured by the amount of lives saved but rather the number that were unfortunately allowed to die. No matter how diligently she works to keep that number low, the types of things she gets involved with ensures it is never going to be zero.
As far as her Captain-peers and her Commander are concerned, Amara has always done a fine job for the Gotei. She completes her assigned tasks and objectives but cares substantially more about doing right by her brothers and sisters in the Division than by her Commander. Thankfully, those two goals often overlap in service of the defense fo the Seireitei. Having had no evolving relationship with any sort of parents for multiple centuries now, she is always open to the positive influence of a mentor somewhere in her life. Given her rank, the places that mentor might come from have done nothing but shrink oven time.
In combat Amara, much like her personality, is a wonky blend of the absurd and the serious. Making grand and indirect use of terrain and circumstance, all the world is a stage when she chooses to engage an unfortunate target. Although she is both experienced and practiced at fighting in squad tactics, when she knows it is a time she must buckle down and get serious she insists on dismissing all but her strongest allies from the vicinity; her Zanpakuto is far too unpredictable and wild a risk to take with those that have not learned to ride it out.
All of this squishes together to paint the picture of a woman who is not pulled in many directions, but rather chooses to grow in many directions at once. She is fluid. Like paint slopped on an easel she runs wherever she feels like running, blending whatever colors she happens to bump into and integrating them into her life. She's a soldier, a friend, a dreamer, a lover, a passionate artist, a daring athlete, a caring mother. But between those lines, at the places where each of those roles overlap, there is the a genuine person who lives all the crazy shit life has to offer. And she will crush anyone that dares threaten that into a fine paste.
